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Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Look a thing!

 (BTW they are all from Endron so yeah)
Silken lives from century to century, apart from the world, though it is he who changed it the most.

Trixie lives from decade to decade, each new end bringing new strife.

Crow lived from year to year, coasting along until a certain someone stormed into his life.

Emily lives from week to week, almost failiing, but never quite.

Summer lives from day to day, always tumbling and just hanging on to the balance beam of life.

so I wrote something..

In English we were supposed to write a satire and so after three days of attempting to find something to write about, my fingers burst forth with inspiration. Actually, in the middle of dinner I somehow became inspired so I just wrote down key points on a napkin because there is no way I would be allowed to leave the table right in the middle of a meal. But then I wrote, and wrote some more, an came up with something that I am for now calling The Angels. It's supposed to be a satire on celebrity, and you can come and angrily comment and say I don't know a thing about what their lives are actually like, but I will not listen unless your name is Katy Perry or Lady Gaga or some such. Until then, I'm going to rely on my years of watching people, stalking people, reading long (And boring) tomes on how people tend to work and make my own assumptions.
     Oh, and part two of this little story is that I printed out my paper, set it on top of my dresser, the default place for 'stick this in your backpack before you go out the door' and then went to bed... and then I obviously didn't bother to notice it this morning. So now I have a late assighnment on top of all those glorious insecurities because literally not a single person in the class told a tale. No, they just exagerated their pet peeves and sounded funny, while I wrote a depressing two page thing about a chick who doesn't even have a name.
     Face-palm to the end of the universe and back.
So yeah. Here it is, The Angels, on celebrity.


They called them the angels.
They were said to live in the clouds, those exalted, their palaces of stone and gems shining for the rest of the world to worship. Always there was the talk. At times it seemed that these people never had a dull moment, never were anything but wonderful, beautiful, to be worshiped. Their clothes were made of the finest threads, their eyes shining with laughter and with the sun in all things. They were said to be different from one another, individual, and surely, surely they tried to be. They were of course different in small ways, in the things they produced. The numbers seemed to move in constant flux, but always there were at least seven. Seven ways to change the world of their lessers.
Once a year they called. Their halls lit up, the light shining through the clouds, and their voice sang out sweet and clear. In those moments, the ones when the eyes of the world were on them, they truly did seem exalted. They seemed more.
But for Her there was only fear. She had never wished to be chosen. Some said that those chosen would become angels themselves, but She knew it to be a lie.
How could one become exalted when all those above the clouds were lies?
With wrists bound to an old column, tears began to drip down Her face. Never again would Her family be Hers, never again would She be able to hope for something normal, and something good. There was only one life for the angel’s and their immediate lessers.
It was not a castle that She found above the clouds. It was a prison, much like the one left behind, the walls covered in words.
Of course, She could not read them. She did not yet know their meaning.
They choose her a guide, and led her through the grungy halls. They were different, every angel. Each had a personality, a look, hobbies and sides of themselves that She had never before seen. But they were all, each and every one of them, broken.
Always they had been idols, and always they had called. Now She knew why. They were not the immortals the world may believe them to be. They passed, replaced with someone much the same. Perhaps this new one wore a cloak, or perhaps they wore nothing at all. But they were all stuck, trapped by a people who worshiped them, trapped by a people that would not let them be released, because it would surely mean that peoples’ downfall.
Yes, some of the lessers rose. But only because an Angel was dying, only because everyone knew that they were soon to pass from the world.
She became a leader of sorts. It was the worst death of them all, one of the oldest, that no one had thought would pass. She was supposed to last forever. The one who had been chosen was charged with the task of living up to the impossible standard.
When She broke, they all saw it coming.
The blood was always cleaned away before the next one came, but they always knew. There were reasons for the coincidences. No death was by accident. All were by choice.
Their clothes were not fine, but pictures, pasted over posters that showed the rags they truly wore. Their lives were lived on the sides of cliffs, always trying to maintain the balance between being amazing and falling to one’s death. Their faces were painted, and only in the dark could they cry and smear the brilliant reds and blues. That was why their eyes shone so. Tears, just held back.
And always, always, that fervent wish…

To go.

Tuesday, January 21, 2014



You are only crazy if you are locked up - Whisp
So, isn't it great that we two are free?

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

In a small way, I feel like I am not the same as the rest of the people here. My biggest OTP is my own.

I have to wonder if other people feel this way. Does J.K. Rowling ship Harry and Ginny, or Hermione and Ron? Does Suzanne Collins ship Peeta an Katniss?

You should all look forward to a lot of cute moments, but at the same time it will be so hard to understand. So many of my characters are complex and diverse, I don’t know how I ever came up with them. I daresay that a few have taken on lives of their own, completely independent of what I try to make them.

That’s the thing about me. I don’t think up stories, ideas of some shadowy figure going on a while adventure, their face only filled in later. I think of people, faces, names, sometimes just a single word that can define them. There are worlds within my head, and yet… they would be nothing without the people that populate them.

I feel so sad when one of them has to go. Sometimes they never arrive in the first place, because there is no room for them in the story. But Bealon and Vanessa are still very much alive in my head, despite how they have been cut from their tales. I know that not everyone can be, but still.
It’s even worse when I have to let them go, when someone it comes to be that Dellie, or Violet, or Chess, must die in order for the world to be saved, or because it is the only way to make others realize their stupidity and the true importance of the people around them.

Sometimes people ask me (close friends, the ones who hear my rants) why I don’t just change the characters, or the story. If the death makes me so sad, them why must it take place? If you hate this character so much, them why not make them more agreeable? Why is that so hard to answer? Why can I not put into words the way that, one the story has been found, it can never be forgotten?
It is so hard to understand things. Addiction is one, though I’m a bit better at knowing about that now that I have found the internet. I suppose your own self is another, and perhaps the largest. As a teenager, I find myself doing and saying things, becoming things, that I have never known before. My brain does not make sense to me, and though I have heard that it is impossible to multitask, I find myself thinking of doing two different things in the same instant. Sometimes words come to me, their source unknown, clouded. I consider that the moment when my characters come to life. I never have to think of what Trixie will say, and for Emily it is hardly a struggle. But for others, I am forced to sit and muse over the next sentence, the next word. For those who know me, I find that with Crow. I want him to be perfect, and yet I know that he cannot be the perfect husband. He must have flaws, because we all have flaws.

Some things come easily, and some do not. It has always been my hope to actually finish my first, and greatest (Not to mention most complicated) story, but I cannot. I am not yet great, and I still have ever so much to learn. But for now, I can fill my time with plotting for the greater days, and with the smaller, an simpler tasks.
                                          …oOo…
I hope you have enjoyed the Beautiful Randomness (I must remember to trademark that) above.
(This was originally posted on Tumbler so yeah.)